Mom of Developmentally Delayed Boy says..............my son has a future in baseball!

Well, there were 3 toys on the roof. They have been there for a couple of months actually. I thought the wind would blow them down or they would get pushed off by the hail or rain we've been having. You would think on those many occasions lately where we've had tornado force winds, that would have been enough. One was Josh's favorite baby girl doll, the one with the pouty look on her face. Josh picked her up and held her in her arms and refused to let go so I could wash her. I said, "well Josh for someone so concerned for their baby girl you only threw her on the roof and left her there for 2 months!" One toy was a plastic bendy man and then some kind of little stuffed spongebob from Burger King. I had told Josh the first time he did this not to throw toys on the roof. What would I do without all of Josh's teacher helpers who give him a small toy daily at school? I had wondered where they were disappearing to since I have to pick up about 150 of them several times a day it seems. I hadn't seen him throw toys on the roof lately but does that mean he didn't? If you've been keeping up with my blog you know the answer to that question is NO. So, today they were all playing nicely with puppy in the backyard so I decided it would be a good time to set up the ladder and pull the toys off the roof. But, what I discovered was many toys and things - in the gutter. There was a plastic bowling pin, a rotting baseball, pieces of sidewalk chalk, McDonald's toys and I don't know some things were barely recognizable. I wonder what other habits he has that I know not the extent of. So, I found more on the neighbors side of the gutter too that he threw way over to the next yard. Josh's new career option: baseball of course. That boy can pitch! Josh signs up to participate in the Special Olympics in 2 years and now I can say I've been working very hard in training him for the events! Who says a person with a cognitive disability couldn't get into professional sports too? Having Joshua on the team might improve my husband's Chicago Cubs standings! Well, even now he could help out. Just send him on the field to create chaos and distract the opposing team. We can call him the mascot!

Mom of Developmental Delayed Son goes.....................beyond Supernanny!

These past 6 years raising my son Joshua have taught me that parents of children with moderate developmental delays who are mobile are probably the most amazing and best parents in the world. However, no one would realize it as a passerby in their lives. We are the ones who trained the "supernannies" of the world. We take these experiences head on everyday with little fear. Out of necessity we have a support network of people to help us hold our heads up everday. I have realized that this is miraculous and not of my own doing. It's sort of like Superman who came into contact with some supernatural power that changed everything. If I sent my son to supernanny's house, she would be running away in tears after a short time with him. Yet, parents of kids with moderate developmental delays who are mobile take such events in stride on a daily basis. Imagine the horror I felt when I turned around after 5 minutes and realized my child was not in the house, then I heard the doorbell ring and there were 2 police officers with my son! They tell me that 3 people had to chase him down and that he runs very fast. They try to tell me that they are parents too and they can understand. But, it doesn't stop that horrible sinking feeling and the feelings of inadequacy that quickly begin to beat me down. I can feel the acid in my stomach churn and my blood vessels constrict.The tears roll down my face and I pray because I am a good, responsible mother who is simply facing something far beyond normal child raising. Doubts arise and I fear for my son. I am no more perfect than anyone else in securing my home and keeping my son in it no matter how many locks and alarms I have installed on the doors and windows. Will people question my ability to care for my own son? Will he still be doing this at age 18? Now I know this is far beyond normal consequences and priviledges. Providing lots of structured activities and outdoor play doesn't stop him either. A behavior chart does not address this and neither does safety education although we HAVE tried all of those things. Then, out of my ashes, the Lord comes to my rescue. A friend tells me that she has cared for children like this before and has had escapees. She happens to be one of the best, most experienced moms I know. Another reassures me that I am a good mother and that I can stand through this. I'm not going to break or give up my responsibility to someone else. God reassures me in His word. I begin to think of new strategies. I revise my ongoing list of ideas and strategies to research. I move on with my life somehow just a little stronger, just a bit more humble each time I am knocked down like this. You see, the problem with supernanny is.......she is not real. Real moms admit they don't have all the answers and they are not afraid to fall, even if they would rather not. Reality requires brokenness, humility and personal growth. The next day, I took the advice of a good friend who has a grown son with Autism. She says when I'm having a bad day, to do something fun and enjoy my child. So, I took Joshua and his older sister to the waterpark and a friend watched the little boys. I can't remember the last time I had so much fun with Josh. I was of course, a mother hawk over his every move stopping him from running towards the deep pool, keeping him from taking other kids' toys....holding him on the float in the lazy river. Laughing together as the water sloshed on our heads was healing from the previous day and it's tensions. On television, one person has ALL the answers, in true reality - no one does. My life amounts to more than any reality show would dare even propose.

Mom of a Developmentally Delayed Son...................uses Child Directed Play Therapy!

I'm not sure how other parents who have children with developmental delays go about protecting their child from danger but we have a sliding back door with the following features: toe lock, flip lock, metal bar lock on top, and an alarm that goes off if the door is opened. As it happens over time and with much use, the bar lock on the top of the door broke off the side of the door. Unfortunately, that is the only lock that my son is unable to open. Well, as I turned my back to use the washroom, he found out that he could indeed open the back sliding door. He routinely checks the doors in the house to determine his ability to find new and exciting things to do. No matter how many structured activities I might provide, he is still searching for more. On this day, he found it. A heavy rainfall had left a massive puddle in our backyard along with areas of saturated mud. When I returned from using the washroom, my other children were still eating breakfast as I was hoping they would do. Yet, where was Joshua? I'm sure you can guess by now that he became covered in mud from head to toe and was happy as could be romping around the backyard in and out of the mud. He threw mud on the siding of the house, on the back windows and all of the outdoor toys. I wish I had my camera. The thing is when these things happen I don't think of taking a picture. I'm strategizing a method to clean up without making a bigger mess by tromping it throughout the house to the bathtub. With his sensory needs met, I provided a bit more added therapy. I got out the hose to spray off the mud. One might think this would bother a child, but he loved it and laughed with glee. Some residue of course still stuck to his skin so then it was bathtime. Since Joshua recently flushed the bathtub plug down the toilet, we settled on a shower instead. This activity provided more sensory stimulation and fun for Joshua. I scrubbed and rinsed him off and then he of course needed to get dry. "Need towwwel, need towwel," he cried. You might wonder how I was feeling about all of this. It was after all a major detour from my plans for the day and the very important other things I needed to accomplish such as feeding Joshua's baby brother. I was fine when I saw him smile in the backyard while I was spraying him with the water. That's when I broke out in laugher and started enjoying this with him. When Dan came home it was obvious what I had accomplished. "What did you do today?" "Oh, I gave Joshua a Child Directed Play Therapy Session Dan!," I said in all seriousness as though I were a Developmental Therapist. Dan knows what that means though and right away he said, "what happened???" We enjoy our son, if we didn't we most certainly would go mad. :)